Balancing Motherhood, Yoga and Writing

January is turning into a month full of reconnecting with old friends. My life-long best friend is visiting along with her mom, an old family friend, this weekend, and tomorrow one of my best friends, who I met at university ten years ago, is coming down from London.

Today, I enjoyed catching up with my ‘mom friends’ who I’ve not seen over the Christmas period, at the breastfeeding drop-in where we volunteer or attend. A newcomer to the drop-in, mother of a tiny one-week-old, remarked on how comfortable the toddlers all looked playing with and around each other, in the space at the Hanover Community Centre. Taking a good look for the first time, I saw that it was true. My little one loves it there and now plays for long periods with only occasional ‘touching base’ with me. The minute he arrived this morning he started asking for ‘ball’, and I realised he remembered a particular ball from playing with it on past occasions at the drop-in. Every day there are new insights into what he remembers, knows and thinks.

A bit later I bumped into one of my newer Brighton friends, who I met before we both became mothers, but who is now also a mother. We chatted about how it is to make the transition from each stage of your baby’s life to the next: my friend is currently navigating the stretch from relatively passive baby to ‘the interactive model’, who at six months is much more insistent about what he wants and needs!  Meanwhile, I recently crossed over from baby land to the world of the toddler. We talked about how it seems that we are always one step ‘behind’ them, and have to catch up, learning new ways of relating to them as we realise that their needs have changed, and that the old ways don’t necessarily work anymore. It occurred to me that I seem to have ‘caught up’ with the Pibler temporarily, at last, and his stage of toddler-dom is not feeling quite so daunting anymore. But no doubt soon I will be scrabbling to keep apace with the developments as he moves into yet another phase!

I feel so lucky to have friends that cover all aspects of my life: my writing friends (one of whom is away travelling, but we’ll reconnect when she returns), my ‘mom’ friends, my ’spiritual/yoga’ friends, and the friends who tick all those boxes, who I can really talk to about all of me. Without this sense of community around me, however fragmented, living in the city can be an isolating experience.